NEED TO BE VALUED

My grandfather lived with us. He was a retired person. As long as he was physically fit, he would do some gardening, make swings for me to play, accompany me to buy Diwali crackers with his pension money and so on. As he aged, he would still try ways and means to be useful. No one told him that he had to do so. If nothing, he would sit on a chair in the veranda while we played, supervising us although it was not really required.

If you observe in your environment, you will find many elderly people who try to make themselves useful. They need to be valued and not feel like a parasite staying in the home. If the home does not need their services, they will be feeding stray animals or will go to a park to engage with random people or visit the bank to update their passbook.

Is the need to be valued a requirement of old age only? Definitely not. We all need to be valued irrespective of our age and gender. In the home, the husband, wife and children look forward to being appreciated for their contribution to the home. In the workplace, we look forward to acknowledgement of our services. We seek feedback both good and bad. If good feedback is received, it acts as a reinforcement. I learn that this level of service needs to continue and I will automatically work on improving it.  A negative feedback highlights where I am lacking and need to improve. I will work on my drawbacks as long as I feel valued in the organization.

As long as I feel valued, I will cheerfully work at home or office. As a leader or manager or head of the family, you must pay minute attention to the contributions made by your team / family. Discuss with them about progress made or what needs to be done to move forward. You will not lose your authority or power if you engage in discussions. An insecure manager is unable to engage the team, appreciate the contribution and as a consequence demoralizes the organization.

Being valued and being liked are not the same; make sure that people value you. To be valued you must bring something to the table. That something could be your knowledge, skills, expertise, experience etc. etc. We need to work on ourselves so that we are always in a position to contribute and help. Think about it. What would you prefer? To be liked or to be valued?